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ARROW-7990: [Developer][C++] Add option to run "archery lint --iwyu" on all C++ files, not just the ones that you changed. Add "match" option to iwyu.sh

Suggestions about a cleaner way to do this would be welcome. I note also that "archery lint" seems to wait until the command is complete to print its output; might be nice to have an option to eagerly print output

Also adds an option `match` to `iwyu.sh` so you can do e.g. `iwyu.sh match ipc` and run IWYU more easily on a subset of files matching a particular POSIX regex

Closes #6522 from wesm/ARROW-7990 and squashes the following commits:

a94689ca9 <Wes McKinney> Add iwyu.sh match option for more easily running IWYU on a particular subset of files
b433ed873 <Wes McKinney> Add --iwyu_all option to 'archery lint'
f005485b0 <Wes McKinney> Exclude arrow/vendored files from IWYU output

Authored-by: Wes McKinney <wesm+git@apache.org>
Signed-off-by: Wes McKinney <wesm+git@apache.org>