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ARROW-17635: [Python][CI] Sync conda recipe with the arrow-cpp feedstock (#14102)

Corresponds to status of feedstock as of https://github.com/conda-forge/arrow-cpp-feedstock/pull/848, minus obvious & intentional divergences in the setup here (with the exception of unpinning xsimd, which was [pinned](https://github.com/apache/arrow/blob/apache-arrow-9.0.0/cpp/cmake_modules/ThirdpartyToolchain.cmake#L2245) as of 9.0.0, but isn't anymore).

Lead-authored-by: H. Vetinari <h.vetinari@gmx.com>
Co-authored-by: Sutou Kouhei <kou@clear-code.com>
Signed-off-by: Sutou Kouhei <kou@clear-code.com>