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GH-41307: [Java] Use org.apache:apache parent pom version 31 (#41309)

### Rationale for this change

Use/update Maven modules to `org.apache:parent:31` and clean up Maven modules to remove unnecessary configuration or outdated workarounds

### What changes are included in this PR?

* Add `org.apache:parent:31` to `org.apache.arrow:arrow-bom` and `org.apache.arrow.maven.plugins:arrow-maven-plugins` to make them conformant with ASF standards
* Update `org.apache.arrow:arrow-java-root` parent to `org.apache:parent:31`
* Use `version.*` and other properties to override plugin versions defined by `org.apache:parent`
* Move standalone plugin versions under pluginManagement at the top level
* Cleanup redundant plugin version or configuration declaration
* Update `maven-dependency-plugin` to 3.6.1 and add the required overrides when necessary
* Update `maven-shade-plugin` to 3.5.1 (via `org.apache:parent`)
* Remove enforcer check for java and maven version (handled by `org.apache:parent`)
* Remove unnecessary `mvnrepository` link comments
* Remove `m2e.version` property check in profiles (only needed for errorprone plugin configuration which is incompatible with M2E)
* Cleanup `argLine` overrides for surefire/failsafe plugins
* Remove unnecessary `../pom.xml` `<relativePath>` directives
* Remove source/target/encoding configuration properties for `maven-compiler-plugin`, `maven-javadoc-plugin` and `maven-resources-plugin` as it is handled by `org.apache:parent` and plugin themselves
* Remove unnecessary copy of codegen templates in `arrow-vector` module
* Remove unnecessary junit jupiter engine dependencies for surefire/failsafe plugins.

### Are these changes tested?

No net new code. tested via CI jobs

### Are there any user-facing changes?

None
* GitHub Issue: #41307

Authored-by: Laurent Goujon <laurent@apache.org>
Signed-off-by: David Li <li.davidm96@gmail.com>