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GH-37500: [CI][C++] Disable Dataset and Substrait by default (#37501)

### Rationale for this change

Datasets and Substrait are heavy subcomponents (as they have non-trivial dependencies), so should not be enabled unwillingly in all CI builds.

### What changes are included in this PR?

Disable Dataset and Substrait in `ci/scripts/cpp_build.sh`, enable them explicitly in relevant builds.

Disable more subcomponents in CI builds that don't need them, especially "minimal" builds.

### Are these changes tested?

Yes, by existing CI jobs.

### Are there any user-facing changes?

No.

* Closes: #37500

Lead-authored-by: Antoine Pitrou <antoine@python.org>
Co-authored-by: Sutou Kouhei <kou@cozmixng.org>
Co-authored-by: Sutou Kouhei <kou@clear-code.com>
Signed-off-by: Sutou Kouhei <kou@clear-code.com>